(This was a sermon delivered by Ma. Angela Alviola dela Cruz-Villalba, at the 8 am service, Sept. 30, 2007)

As we celebrate Family Sunday and the Fellowship of the Least Coin, I would like us to reflect on two women in the Bible, they are nameless, but they continue to inspire women and men through the centuries throughout the Christian world.

The woman in Proverbs is often called the Ideal Wife. She is a) hardworking – she does not eat the bread of idleness, b) an excellent manager of the household – she rises early, provides food and clothing for the household, gives instructions to her maidens; c) an entrepreneur – acquires land and makes it productive, makes linen and sells to merchants, d) generous – opens her hand to the poor and reaches out to the needy. According to Proverbs, she is a woman more precious than jewels. Her husband and children love and respect her. A woman who fears the Lord. 

We have such women in our church, even here and now in our midst, and in our society. 

The other woman is known as the Widow with the mite who, in her poverty, put in her last two copper coins into the treasury. She had love and faith in God that was far greater than her need. Often our faith is measured by our need. The more we need, the more faith, is required. But the widow in the story, had a faith greater than the sum of her need. She gave more than what was required. She gave everything out of her love for, and in total trust in, her God. And that impressed Jesus! She is more precious to Jesus than all those who put in large sums into the treasury contributing, out of their abundance. This kind of giving impresses men. The widow’s giving impressed God.

We also have such rare women in our church, in our midst, in our society. Women of great faith, greater than the sum of their need, who give themselves as a sacrifice.

When we put our least coins into the treasury, three things happen:

1. We pray –

    

It is not the coin that comes into the treasury, that impresses God, but the prayer that precedes the giving. One coin represents one prayer, a word, that communicates our love for and trust in God. How many prayers have we made during the year? Were not these prayers mainly prayers demanding from God? Like statements of accounts? God, I want this, I need this, give me this, give me that? What have we communicated with our giving? We communicate mostly our needs. The Fellowship of the Least Coin deeply believes in the power of prayer. It is a movement of prayer to give to God out of faith and trust in, and love, for God’s goodness. It was conceived when Shanti Solomon who was part of a seven Christian women team led by Dr. Margaret Shannon  who traveled to Asian countries that were devastated by the Second World War, to heal the hurt and the divisions of nations that were created by the bitterness and hatred in their hearts brought about by the wanton slaughter of human lives. This journey gave birth to the movement of prayer for justice, peace and reconciliation. Prayers which acknowledged the depravity of human beings, as a whole. Prayers which sought to give sacrificially to God, for the sins of all humanity, whether done by the guilty or the innocent. This prayer is given beyond the sum of the need of the giver. It is given for the sum for all our sins as human race. Like the widow, who gave beyond her need. This kind of love for God is required as much now, as 60 years ago. Today we live in a world deeply divided by many things.

Families are divided because of poverty and want. Many women have to leave the warmth of home and community to work abroad, often under hostile and difficult conditions so that there may be food for their families back home. While many more at home aspire to leave the country, there were some I have met overseas who ask, “When can we ever come home, have decent jobs and be with our families?”

Our communities are divided between the haves and have nots. I have not been long in Dumaguete but I see that there are very strong opposing opinions on many issues. There are those who wonder where the best food and service can be had among the increasing number of restaurants and resorts. On the other hand, as I go to the market even towards lunch time, I have on many occasions discovered that market vendors are unable to have sufficient change for a one hundred peso bill because even at this late hour in the morning many vendors have not yet made a sale. Which leads me to ask, “how much do they make in a day?”          

Our nation confronts any number of scandals and corruption in government. A new one comes up such as the ZTE, even before a previous one is resolved, such as the Hello Garci controversy. Greed for wealth and power continue to keep our nation divided. Debates and investigations in Congress are expensive, time consuming and often are unproductive for ordinary people.

Wars and conflict hug the world’s headlines everyday, suicide bombings in Iraq and Afghanistan . Protests and shooting of protesters in Burma . Displacement of hundreds of thousands of families in various countries in Africa .

More than ever, we need to pray for justice, peace and reconciliation. When we put in a coin we pray for the reconciliation of feuding members of the family, for forgiveness and healing of wounds that divide our churches, communities and nations.      

2. We love in a sacrificial way –

    

Love is the most used and spoken word today, apart from globalization, someone said. But more often this love has strong commercial overtones. In radio and television programs we hear the word “kapuso” or exclusive “kapamilya” casually said. It is love that does not go beyond the self. Proverbs describe the woman’s love as self-sacrificing. She works from early morn to late evening to provide for her family and household, to the poor and the needy. It is this love that impels her to work hard, to become creative and entrepreneurial and to invest well, beyond her personal needs.

It reminds me of a story in a church conference in Mindanao . In one of its annual conferences,  the Christian Women’s Association was tasked to provide for the meals of all the delegates amounting to thousands of pesos. There were a few well-off churches but most of the local CWA were poor farmers from the rural churches. They wanted to contribute to the assembly of believers, but they had no cash. The President of the CWA then thought of a way. We need to raise money, but most churches had little money. So she asked that for one year, each member of each church can contribute a portion of what they will eat for a meal. A fistful of rice, one ear of corn, a piece of camote or two or balanghoy will be set aside, for the forthcoming assembly. These will be pooled together every month and sent to the more well-off churches to be sold. This is what they did and to cut the long story short, by conference time, there was enough food for all delegates. And more conference delegates were able to attend, because food had been taken cared of. The host churches of course shared their homes, to the visiting delegates. Here we witness the sacrificial love of the CWA members. “Kaonon na lang, ihatag pa gyud.”    

And what is more, believe it or not, the CWA President unexpectedly received manifold blessings in her life and so did the churches that were part of the movement. She was able to share this blessing to the churches, for the building or repair of more churches, etc.

It is this sacrificial love that enabled the widow to put her everything into the treasury. It is loving to the point where it hurts. A love that was greater than her need. And God rewards abundantly, or rewards beyond our needs.

3. We sow the seeds of justice, peace and reconciliation –

When we put our least coins into the treasury we put our faith that in these least coins as seeds of justice, peace and reconciliation which are sown on the soil of those who are in need. The fellowship of the least coin, enables small groups of women all over the world, to start their ministries. These ministries include training women in skills for evangelism and livelihood. A few years back our project received support from FLC to train poor women, Muslim and Christian in food processing in Davao City . With the training these women were able to put up their own livelihood and experience a sense of being communities of love.

On 8^th February, the All Africa Council of Churches (AAC) launched the publication “Mustard Seeds: Church and Grassroots actions against poverty in Africa ”, success stories that demonstrate grassroots communities struggles against poverty. One example is the Somali Christian Refugees in Kenya , mostly women who were able to establish running water in their villages, medical care and pre-school facilities for children. And there are many others. Where did the miracle come from? From the sacrifice of widows, poor churches, who gave in just a few coins, out of their prayers and their faith.

The miracle in sacrificial giving is not immediately evident. But putting together the small coins mainly from the poor in every society, adds up to great sums such as US$ 210,000 last year which were used for worthy purposes. More importantly, the sacrificial giving is a manifestation of the power of the Holy Spirit to move people to have faith and to share love anonymously for the miraculous work of God.

These acts of prayer, love and justice and reconciliation differs from the mainstream philanthropy of Bill Gates and similar outfits that is announced and well covered by the media with photos of business CEOs complete with shovels ground breaking of projects. The Fellowship of the Least Coin is typical of a woman who in her quiet and inclusive way prays, and loves in faith and action. And God who hears these quiet prayers shall pour in His blessings openly and abundantly.

There is an old story worth telling here. What is the difference between the Sea of Galilee and the Dead Sea ? The sea of Galilee is full of fish and life because it pours itself into the Jordan river . The Dead Sea is dead, because it receives the waters from the Jordan river , but never gives its waters to anywhere else. It receives but never gives. This is the way of death.

Our churches in the Philippines were the first to gather least coins. Our offerings became the first source of money for the building of orphanages in south Korea , immediately after the war. For Shanti Solomon, who was stranded in the Philippines on account of the fact that she was not given a visa to south Korea, began her fellowship of the least coin in the Philippines, and the proceeds went to south Korea .

And we have been blessed, and we continue to be part of that fellowship of women, who give out of a great love for God, giving beyond our needs. Let us once again be part of that fellowship.

Ephesians 6:1-4

There is a song by Madonna a few years back that goes:

Papa I know you’re going to be upset; ‘Cause I was always your little girl
But you should know by now; I’m not a baby

You always taught me right from wrong
I need your help, daddy please be strong; I may be young at heart; But I know what I’m saying

The one you warned me all about; The one you said I could do without
We’re in an awful mess, and I don’t mean maybe - please

Chorus: Papa don’t preach, I’m in trouble deep; Papa don’t preach, I’ve been losing sleep
But I made up my mind, I’m keeping my baby, I’m gonna keep my baby, mmm…

Fathers are always thought of as pillars of strength. They are always seen as understanding, always smiling, ever accommodating, they never cry. They are a strong pillar of the family. But today, UCM Sunday, let me say on behalf of church men, fathers dread being told, Dad I’m pregnant. I’m sorry, I did not listen to you. The biggest test of love and courage for a father is in a disaster like this. Less perceptive Dads will take this as a rejection by their children. What should a parent do, when something expressly forbidden is consciously defied? After an infringement, what is there to do but embrace the child and go all out to help and rehabilitate a situation?

The parable of the faithful father better known as the parable of the prodigal son, is such a story. The son demands his freedom. Freedom is given. He lives profligately and comes to grief. He realizes his mistake and returns to his father on bended knees. Father forgives him and restores his status as a son, fully.

We live in a rapidly changing world that directly challenges family values. Let us examine some statistics about family. Divorce rates. In the United States in 1980, the percentage of all marriages that ended in divorce was 41% or 4 of 10 marriages. By 2002, divorces had declined to 31% or 1 in 3 marriages. But before you start rejoicing, researchers claim the decline was not due to stronger marriages. They were due to the popularity of “living in” arrangements without marriage.

Teen pregnancies. The fifth annual State of the World’s Mothers report, published by the Save the Children NGO, found that 13 million births (one tenth of all births worldwide) each year are to women aged 15-19, and more than 90% of these births are in developing countries. Complications from pregnancy and childbirth are the leading cause of death in young women in developing countries. An estimated 70 000 adolescent mothers die each year because they have children before they are physically ready for parenthood, the report says.

Mobility of parents: In the Philippines , one tenth (10%) of the population or 8 million Filipinos are working overseas, 70% of them are women, earning the country US$ 8 billion – US$ 14 billion in annual remittances. Presuming that half of OFW are heads of families then 4 million families are at risk for having one or both parents absent from the family. In Madonna’s song at least the father taught his daughter right from wrong. In the case of OFW families, there is no one to teach little girls or boys. This situation of dysfunctional families affects 24 million Filipinos or roughly 30% of the population.

Alcohol abuse: USA TODAY 2/27/2002, reported Girls are Drinking Like Boys: Surveys showed that alcohol abusers  were as likely to be teen age girls 48% as boys 52%.

Why? Because behavioral influences on children have shifted from family to MTV, or young friends, or the latest magazine. Many young people have absentee parents.

So it is not surprising that juvenile delinquency is a runaway problem. Many cities including Dumaguete, now impose curfews for minors. In yesterday’s Philippine Daily Inquirer, the mayor of Baguio City imposed a 9 pm- 5 am curfew among minors to stop crimes involving the youth there. Mayor Reinaldo Bautista Jr. said the curfew is a necessary approach to stamp out  vandalism, unruliness and youth-related violence which occur sporadically.

Internet aggression: Cyber-bullying, also known as Internet bullying, is when an individual or group targets another individual or group using interactive technology such as e-mail, social networking sites,  instant messaging (IM) and/or text messaging. Cyber-bullying is occurring even among children whom adults would never suspect. School Principals have reported incidents where elementary school children who do well academically, seem to have many friends, and are well behaved at school, are also engaging in online aggression. In a study, a 12-year-old girl explained: “In school…you don’t want anyone to think of you as a ‘gossip’ or someone who says bad things about other people. Everyone wants to be ‘nice.’ Online  You don’t have to be nice if you don’t want to.”

For example, a cyber-bully set up a website with photos of three classmates: “Vote for the ugliest, fattest kid in school,” it said. The three victims watched as hundreds of people voted. Because the Internet offers a sense of protection from cultural norms and watchful eyes of adults, children and adolescents are exposed to hateful and abusive behavior online, and they learn to say things they would never say offline.

We could go on and on. Suffice it to say, parenting is a much more challenging responsibility today than it was say 50 years ago.

If Prov. 22.6 says “Train up a child in the way he should go, And when he is old he will not depart from it” how is a child trained without a parent? How is a child trained when parents do not know the Bible, or how do parents compete with global bullies in your children’s bedroom? Let me end with some suggestions:

1.The fight to save our children begins at home. Christian homes are the ramparts, the environment, the atmosphere, the climate where the Lordship of Jesus Christ is first truly experienced, valued and nurtured. Experience God’s  Love, extend His grace at home. Talk to your children. Talk to your parents. Spend time together.

2. Come and strengthen your church. Mom and Dad must come to church, attend Bible studies. You cannot give spiritual strength to your children, that you don’t have. If you don’t like something about the church, write a letter. Participate. Join a group – UCM, CWA. If you say, “I don’t want to listen to the sermon. It’s  boring!” Talk to the pastor. But don’t leave the church, or your children will follow you out. Your son or your daughter may stay home or go to the barkada. They may flip on the TV and catch the latest MTV videos, or they may log on to the computer and surf the net and talk to pedophiles. Start building your children’s future in church fellowships.

3. Fathers do not provoke your children to wrath. Here are 10 DONTS:
1. Don’t ML them. Extreme regimentation will provoke children to rebel.
2. Don’t play Favorites. Favoring one over the other, develops negative emotions.
3. Don’t Compare your kids with one another, it drives them away.
4. Don’t push for achievements beyond reasonable bounds, this creates feelings of inadequacy and forces children to seek approval elsewhere.
5. Don’t discourage them, it pushes them into the arms of other people.
6. Don’t make the child feel unwanted. Don’t treat them like they are intruding on your life, it turns children off.
7. Don’t use love as a tool for reward and punishment, it makes them cynical about your love, destroys the integrity of Christian love.
8. Don’t be absent. Failing to let them grow up in a normal life, leads to confusion.
9. Don’t abuse them Physically and verbally. They will do the same to others.
10. Don’t Tease and taunt them, they will learn to hate.

We only have our kids for a short time & once it’s over… it’s over. A man came upon three stone masons on a construction project, and asked what are you doing? The first replied that he was laying bricks. The second described his work as that of building a wall. But the third laborer demonstrated genuine esteem for his work when he said, “I am building a great cathedral.”

Pose that question to any two fathers about their roles in the family, and you are liable to get different answers. The first may say, “I am supporting a family.” But the second may say, “I am raising children.” The former looks at his job as putting bread on the table. But the latter sees things in God’s perspective: he is loving and shaping the lives of his children.

Madonna, Britney Spears, etc. may sing Papa don’t preach, perhaps because Papa was a truant himself. But with God’s love, and spirit, with integrity, Dad’s preaching can do wonders.

A survey was conducted among teens: “What comes to mind when you think of the word ’dad’?” Answers came immediately. One boy said, “I think of the word jerk.” Others thought of the words angry, mad, and absent. On the other hand, some young people said, “I think of wholeness, kindness, security, safety.” Dad is a very powerful word and it depends on you.

And hey Dads… and Moms. We make mistakes, we say the wrong words and do the wrong things. But God is ready to forgive. He is ready to help & support you. Go home today and humble yourself before your kids and ask for forgiveness… hug them, love them, and affirm them in Jesus. And they will gladly obey.

Greetings of peace in Christ! This is your new pastor and university chaplain, Pastor Noel C. Villalba, since June 1, 2007. May I invite you to walk in faith with me? Just put in a reflection or ask a question or make a comment on my sermons and reflections which I would like to post here regularly. You will find that I am an enthusiastic communicator once we get a conversation going.

 What is the rationale for this blog?

Simply put, a pastor is one who listens to people, to their joys and their fears. Talk to me about the situation of your faith, a burden which you carry, or trouble with your sense of purpose in life. It is my duty and my joy, to help you strengthen your faith and to point to some direction where your questions, if any, may be answered. I am not saying I have all the answers. Maybe you already have the answer and you simply want a second opinion. You can talk to me. Rest assured, I have had training in pastoral counseling and I am sincere in proclaiming the good news of Jesus Christ and all the benefits that derive from faith. Besides, everyone is on a faith journey in life, including you and I. To have a trustworthy dialogue partner, makes faith reflection easier, more enriching and more enjoyable.

Why should you trust me about your questions?

I am a pastor who empathizes with all. I am 57 years old and a pastor for the last 10 years. I have a happy family life. I am happily married to Maria Angela Alviola dela Cruz and have three children with her — Tara, Vida and Omar, who are all married, and through them we have four lovely grandchildren — Kira, Bayani, Oyayi and Miggy. I have been working as a church worker for 27 years now and tremendously blessed in the ministry.

So put in a word. I will put in another. And you add another, and so on and so forth. We will walk with God together. God bless you.

March 15, 1921 – September 11, 2007

John 14: 1-8

Life is a precious gift. We did not choose to be born and life is not always nice. But we meet people who care and love, and we thank God that life is made precious through the gifts we receive.

My first recollection of Dr. Dato was his awesome initial R.R. Dato scrawled in my enrolment form. With his signature, you feel like you finally belong to Silliman. He legitimizes your enrollment and signs your diploma. R.R. Dato was a VIP, visible at graduation and university convocations.

Secondly I remember he was part of a game foursome, in tennis. He played with the likes of Dr. Cicero Calderon, Dr. Crispin Maslog, Hubert Reynolds and others… He was sometimes hard working in chasing balls, sometimes not, self-effacing in victory, and generous in defeat. Not in the same league as James Palmore or Art Cuevas, but a tennis player who had much fun playing.

My next acquaintance with him was 30 years later, when a niece of mine Lilou got married to his son, Jun Dato. This enabled me to know the person better.

RR. Dato’s humble beginnings were in Kabankalan. Born in March 15, 1921, a Catholic, Dr. Dato grew up in a large loving family. His father was a teacher. He had 8 siblings. RR went to high school in Bacolod. While there he heard about Silliman Universiy through a recruitment campaign. He then took up BS Education at Silliman. He was a working student in the office of the Registrar. He met Miss Montserrat Amores, another Sillimanian, in college and eventually married her, with whom he had two children. He took his Masters and Ph. D. in Education from Silliman. He became a regular Silliman church member. He was a voracious reader of Readers Digest, a subscriber since 1940s.

RR Dato was God’s gift to many of us. When I asked the family to summarize the life of “Dad” or “Lolo”, with word images, they gave me these: provider, strong, caring, giving, athletic, determined, courageous, loving, honest, respectful, kind, free hearted, calm, patient, warm, gallant, gentlemanly, devoted family man, friendly, jolly, accommodating, diplomatic, generous, protective, story teller.

Two gifts that RR Dato possessed were the gift of giving and the gift of compassion. For example, when his brother did not do so well financially, he gave him money generously. His compassionate devotion for his ailing wife is also well known. When his wife was weak with illness, he showed loving care, serving her well, paying attention to minute details of her needs. He was a loving husband to the end. RR’s wife died, 30 July, 2006. He was a fierce family man and loyal Sillimanian. Once he was offered a position as registrar at the University of the East in Manila. He turned it down, because it would separate him from his family. Dr. Dato was an incredible gift to his family and to Silliman.

Life is a precious gift to families and communities. We are precious in the eyes of God. For God  so loved the world. We’re not precious because we’re perfect. We’re precious because God loves us. We were made in the image of God (Gen. 2). But not all of us apreciate the gift that comes from being made in God’s image.

The gift of joy in RR Dato’s life are Junjun and Pinky and grandchildren, Aya and Bongkie. He played with them and loved them. This intensity grew even after his wife died. He confessed to the family last year, his last Christmas with them, that it was his happiest. He suffered a stroke in April 2007 and has been in hospital ever since. He was still jolly, even if he could no longer speak.

In my weekly visits, I would hold his hand in prayer, he would press my hand eagerly in response. Last night, as he labored for breath, we prayed with him, sang Amazing Grace, Great is Thy faithfulness, It is well with my Soul, He Hideth My Soul, etc.

It’s never easy parting with a precious gift. But lets comfort ourselves with the thought that God feels our loss. Jesus Himself cried with Mary and Martha in the loss of their brother. But Jesus assures us, “let not your heart be troubled, for you believe in God, then believe also in me.”

I have been asked — “if God is loving, why is there death.” I see it differently — because God is loving there is death. As Dr. Dato suffered last night, part of my prayer was, Lord, let him not suffer so. Take him into your loving arms.

What would it be like to have pain in our bodies forever, to live with a fragile body forever? Our physical bodies age. Dr. Dato died at 86. Death can be a blessing. The Bible encourages us in Psalm 90:12 (NIV) Teach us to number our days aright, that we may gain a heart of wisdom. The message of the Bible is not that life will be long but rather that we live everyday purposefully in Christ. RR Dato understood this. He gave his life as a gift to others. God’s gift is our life, our gift is our lives.

God has taken RR Dato away from us. God has allowed death in this world, not so much to frighten us, but to remind us of who we are, our limitations, and what is really important in life. God wants to walk closer with us than death ever could. God wants a close relationship with us, he gives us life, we give our lives to him.

Soon it will be Christmas and we will singing Christmas songs… John 3:16-17 “For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life. 17For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through him.

God so loved, he gave a gift of His Son. Through Jesus Christ, we receive the gift of forgiveness.

To receive it, we simply acknowledge, yes God I know that I have sinned and deserve death . I ask your forgiveness and I accept the work that Jesus Christ has done on my behalf. I give my life to serve Him in appreciation of the work He has done for me.

Death is never the end for those who die in the Lord. It is a sad time, but it is not without hope. For we who die in Christ, know that a day is coming when we shall all be united once again. We believe that Jesus died and rose again. ”Christ was offered once to bear the sins of many. To those who eagerly wait for him, he will appear a second time, apart from sin, for salvation” (Heb. 9:28). Let us receive the gift of God in Jesus Christ and let us give ourselves as a gift to one another.